Baldur's Gate 3, please stop calling that thing in my eye a tadpole

Once upon a time, I knew a girl who was disturbed by hair. She had no issue with the hair on her own head or that of others, but thick beards made her uncomfortable. She couldn't stand pets because they shed hair, and she would scream just like most people would upon encountering a dust bunny if she ever saw one. We all have our peculiar things that we can't tolerate. My wife despises teeth, especially loose, bloody, or broken ones. My father watches medical dramas, but turns away during surgeries because he's too sensitive. As for me, it's the eyes. I have pretty poor vision but can't wear contact lenses because I fear anything near my eyes. In horror movies, I cover my face whenever there's something gruesome involving eyes. So, wasn't it just splendid when Baldur's Gate 3 began with a dreadful snail being inserted into your eye socket in a first-person perspective?

I had a vague notion that Baldur's Gate 3 didn't feature a classic big bad evil guy in the form of a colossal dragon or beholder. A mind flayer is, of course, an absolute pinnacle BBEG, but instead of battling a specific dreadful squid-like monster, I knew the campaign began with the overarching concept of mind control, rather than "killing this one evil guy." I also knew that brain manipulation and parasites played a role - with the PC release happening a whole month before the console version, there were certain things I couldn't avoid. However, for it to go right into your eye socket as the very first thing? You allowed me to experience that as an unsettling surprise.

Obviously, this is a major component of the game, so the characters constantly talk about it. They want to find a cure for it and locate its source, but they also encounter so-called True Souls who celebrate its presence. It can even be used as a means of manipulation in conversations, although its applications have a cooldown. It's not just a gross thing that you can forget about - the game constantly reminds you that the sole reason for doing anything is that you have a beetle in your eye.

The worst part is that they constantly refer to them as "tadpoles." This has two effects, and both are dreadful. Firstly, it gives the impression of kawaii, as if they are just silly little creatures swimming around in there. It feels like an expression of endearment, as if you were naming your pet cow before slaughtering it and serving it as steak. Secondly, it reminds you that they are alive and swimming inside. It's not something we would recognize as "alive" like bacteria, for example, or something artificial like a computer chip. It's a living thing, right behind your eyes, swimming around, right next to your eyeballs.

In its defense, the game didn't help me get over this whole eye thing, but at least it confronted me with it to some extent. At the party after the goblin camp, Volo offered to examine my eye. I knew that wouldn't be a good idea, but since I had just saved the game, I allowed it. First, he went in with a needle, fortunately, the game took another angle and made it clear that he was poking around the eye rather than going through it. It's still extremely gross, but much better than the alternative. He didn't succeed, so the ice pick came into play. What the hell, I can just load another save file, right?

The ice pick went in. My eye came out. It landed directly on the filthy ground, and for some reason, everyone in my group wasn't okay with that. Oh well, I'm the villain here, I suppose. However, the replacement eye allows me to see invisibility, so I guess it was all worth it. I chose to keep this current save file, my new ability serving as a reward for my tremendous bravery during the eye operation. A kind of equivalent to a lollipop at the doctor's office in Faerûn.

I can't believe that the game currently leading the race for my Game of the Year revolves around having to remove something from my eye and that I'm already so desperate that the ice pick comes into play. I still hate that we call them "tadpoles," but despite everything, it's a cool reversal to fight the BBEG by making your entire quest about preventing yourself from becoming the BBEG. But please, stop calling them tadpoles.